It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
