Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
