i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
