is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Randomize
