If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Randomize