I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
