You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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