think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize