i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
