i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Randomize
