Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
