Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
We have started to decorate penises.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Randomize