They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
You ate ashes out of my bong
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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