That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
