Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Randomize