We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
