i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
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So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize