a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
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