Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
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The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
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Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
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