Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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