In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Blood and glitter go together right?
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
