yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
