So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize