Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
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