You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Randomize
