she kept yelling 'call me bella'
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
