so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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