Just fell off a train. Bad.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
