Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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