its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Randomize