I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
MIDGETS
????
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Randomize
