Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Randomize