and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize