On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Randomize