Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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