I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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