I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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