Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(732): View more from New Jersey

When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(732): When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest. http://tfl.nu/kqsj

Replies (29) Good night (673) Bad night (5221)
Favorite
(214): View more from Texas

we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(214): we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER. http://tfl.nu/9rv5

Replies (58) Good night (12813) Bad night (1153)
Favorite
(206): View more from Washington

I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(206): I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log. http://tfl.nu/ft0h

Replies (47) Good night (15442) Bad night (944)
Favorite
(917): View more from New York City

had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(917): had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary. http://tfl.nu/06cp

Replies (6) Good night (3883) Bad night (901)
Favorite
(707): View more from California

I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(707): I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it. http://tfl.nu/727e

Replies (26) Good night (1403) Bad night (4772)
Favorite
(573): View more from Missouri

you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(573): you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment. http://tfl.nu/2sfo

Replies (7) Good night (1859) Bad night (577)
Favorite
(479): View more from Arkansas

This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(479): This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!" http://tfl.nu/9tko

Replies (26) Good night (1010) Bad night (1788)
Favorite
(314): View more from Missouri

Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(314): Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity http://tfl.nu/auuk

Replies (6) Good night (1115) Bad night (537)
Favorite
(216): View more from Ohio

I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(216): I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair http://tfl.nu/q3gk

Replies (6) Good night (761) Bad night (1582)
Favorite
(508): View more from Massachusetts

Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(508): Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering. http://tfl.nu/eppe

Replies (8) Good night (620) Bad night (1685)
Favorite
(541): View more from Oregon

Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(541): Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude. http://tfl.nu/4zcp

Replies (22) Good night (991) Bad night (599)
Favorite
(217): View more from Illinois

Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(217): Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again. http://tfl.nu/k53k

Replies (9) Good night (1481) Bad night (558)
Favorite
(208): View more from Idaho

Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(208): Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options. http://tfl.nu/ep0w

Replies (4) Good night (1020) Bad night (544)
Favorite
(314): View more from Missouri

We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(314): We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake http://tfl.nu/bbs3

Replies (6) Good night (791) Bad night (480)
Favorite
(508): View more from Massachusetts

Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(508): Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada. http://tfl.nu/kq1p

Replies (5) Good night (331) Bad night (821)

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: