he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
