What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
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