I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
