All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
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