brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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