is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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