girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize