Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
