Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
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