My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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