dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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