Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
The beers last night were like the tears from god
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he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
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