Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
